If this shit is greenlighted, what the fuck do networks redlight?

Julia, Jodie, Sarah, and I are sitting in my living room watching, perhaps, what is one of the most nugatory shows on television. Seriously! Who Wants to Be a Superhero? on Sci-Fi has signaled that we are in the midst of the end times. It is a reality show with Stan Lee (yes the Spiderman Stan Lee). The contestants dress in costumes fashioned after superheroes of their own creation. Most of the contestants are in the 30+ age bracket, and Stan Lee gives them missions they must complete in full costume around a city (like saving a child pretending to be lost...thank god they use a white girl so that people are concerned).

BONUS: The man who bears a resemblance to Kano from Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance and refers to himself as a "mortal."

DOUBLE BONUS: Their residence for the duration of the show is called "The Lair."

Why does summer TV hate me?

A List of Ideas

Here is a list of ideas that I am having right now:

-I am in love with the summer so much, that I want to marry it, but I realize that I can't because clearly the summer is a homosexual.

-I need to get started on the Reptile Rapture trilogy before it is stolen by Jerry Bruckheimer.

-I should do something about that stale Nerd Rope from the Green Meadows gas station.

-I eat like a child.

-Sometimes I wonder why I fit in best with gay men.

-This post is banal.

-Why is Lance Bass coming out news now?

-What the hell is wrong with Ann Coulter?

Horticultural Nostalgia

I am currently reading archived "Dykes to Watch Out For," comic strips. This is what I did when I had down time at the Resource Center (except this was before the internet archive so I only saw what was in the books of strips. Thank you intranets). I am not a big comic person, although I do have a few that I enjoy, but I love this strip. I always forget about it and so the return is always sweet. I love Alison Bechdel's observations and characterizations of queer life. It is interesting to see how the comic has transformed with "the GLBT movement" (yes, I know this is a contentious term, but I am using it for simplicity's sake) to become one of the most hilarious and accurate records of how this movement has progressed. The beginning strips deal almost exclusively with "lesbian" issues, but as our communities have expanded, become more diverse, and had a multitude of issues intermal and external to the "community" in the national spotlight, Bechdel has extended her scope to include characters who are not "dykes" in the strictest definition of the term. It has become less homo/hetero centered and more all-inclusively queer. However, all of these characters certainly have dyke sensibilites in some capacity. When I read it, I always get the fluttering feeling I used to have when I first met lesbians as teenager; the excitement of meeting people who seemed to be fully realized versions of what was then, to me, only a feeling. I can connect many of the characters in this strip to myself and a lot of the dykes I met when I was sixteen. The critique of current events in each strip also adds to this nostalgiac feeling, especially, during the halcyon Clinton years.

Thank you, Alison Bechdel, for showing us that we can have an activist spirit and still have a sense of humor about it.

1980's vs 1940's: The Final Showdown

This Sunday marked the return of my concert-going. I went to the Peaches show at the Grenada in Lawrence. This show was ON FIRE! She perfomed a lot of stuff from the new Impeach My Bush album AND had some burlesque dancers wearing nothing but star pasties on stage with her. God she made pasties seem hot! Julia and I were going to stand on the upper-level, but the music started and we just couldn't contain our need to dance. We jumped the rail and got into the pit of sweaty people (there was no air conditioning in the Grenada and it was the hottest day of the year so far). I ended up meeting a woman in the crowd and we ended up dancing through the whole concert....and....my shirt was so soaked that I had to borrow one from Andrew for the trip back to CoMo. Anyhow, it was a great show and I highly recommend seeing Peaches live if you are ever fortunate enough.

Last night Julia and I watched the epic film Xanadu. It might be the most ridiculous movie I have seen yet (and those of you who know me understand that I have a high ridiculousness threshhold). Here is a description of the plot from the movie box: "Xanadu is a look at the future and a loving remembrance of the way things were in the heyday of Hollywood....Olivia Newton-John, the screen's newest love goddess, will dazzle your senses with her luminous beauty and beautiful voice. She and Gene Kelly star in this dazzling musical fantasy. The 40's meet the 80's in XANADU, a very special love story and the first lavish, old-fashioned musical to utilize today's music" That's right: GENE FUCKING KELLY IS IN THIS MOVIE! This movie inspired another summer brainstorm of an idea: XANADU themed skating party!

Who's with me?

LYLAS!

Ye Olde Towne Kryer has been updated! Now on to more pressing issues. I think I have the greatest idea for a bitchin' back tattoo. It would be a castle with a huge drawbridge. On top of that castle would sit a big ass dragon with flames. EVIL FLAMES! He would resemble King Koopa from Super Mario Bros. and at the top: the words "King of the Castle!"